Against all hope, this morning I woke up- STILL PREGNANT. As hopeful as we were that the crazy blood moon would convince this one to leave her happy nest, it didn’t. And so… I’m still here, still waiting, still pregnant. The past few weeks have gotten so uncomfortable. SO SO SO uncomfortable for this Mama but I’m doing my best to keep my eye on the prize and hope for sooner arrivals and not later ones. Don’t bother asking “if I’ve tried _______” Yes. Yes, yes. I have been walking walking walking. Bouncing on my exercise ball, eating pineapple, downing spicy meals, etc. And yes, even those things you little old ladies are too embarrassed to ask me if I’ve tried… WE’VE TRIED THAT TOO.
It’s fairly obvious at this point that Baby Girl Atkinson has inherited every bit of stubbornness from her daddy, ;0) and like her Mama, she refuses to be like “all those other babies” because that “fool proof method” just ain’t working for this little one.
Even though my back aches, I don’t sleep at night anymore, my heartburn/ indigestion has gone to another level, and my sciatica is KILLING me, I’m doing my best to enjoy these last few days. These are the last moments that it will be just me and her, the last Sunday afternoon naps, the last time I’ll get to just lay in bed in the morning and stare into my sweet husband’s eyes without a baby crying for our attention, the last time I’ll jump in my car without having to strap in a little one and make sure I’m taking enough toys and bottles to get us through a 1 hour trip to the grocery store. The last time Wes and I will walk down the street without pushing her along in a stroller, the last blog post I’ll write without a little nugget curled asleep on my chest ( or screaming from the other room for XYZ).
People have told me over and over again to enjoy _____. Because you’ll never have that again. Like this gift we’re about to receive is really some sort of a curse. Like the joy won’t outweigh the difficulty. Like we haven’t spent the past almost 5 years of our married life doing just that. Can we, as women, PLEASE stop doing that? Stop terrifying people into thinking they’ll never be happy again because they’re having a child? This is the GREATEST gift God gives us. Let’s start treating it as such!
We’ve enjoyed _____. We enjoyed one another, and quiet car rides, and silent houses, and cute kick nacks on coffee tables, and leaving razors on the side of the tub, and staying out late without having to worry about the little one at home. We’ve been on hundreds of date nights, slept in tons of Saturdays, been able to leave the house without asking the other to watch the babe for a few minutes. I’ve taken lots of long showers, enjoyed putting makeup on all at once and not having to take 20 breaks to get her settled, walked through stores without a screaming baby, enjoyed only having to get myself dressed for church on Sunday Mornings, and embraced the time without someone DEMANDING breakfast.
Yes, We’re ready.
We’ve tried everything to get her out.
Yes, We’re excited.
If you need something from now until she’s born, I’ll be walking.
WALKING WALKING WALKING.